I Probably Have

Annalee still takes bottles, generally from Dada, but occasionally from Mama, too. Not a lot of parents give their children formula so far into the second year; many stop at the end of the first year. She also, though, continues to breastfeed. And she also eats a wide variety of solid foods with gusto. Among the reasons that I wanted to postpone bottle weaning was that I didn't want to be perceived as the withholding parent. Call me selfish, if you will. But there were other reasons, too. For one thing, removing sources of comfort from a child before she is able to verbalize her wants and needs and feelings was counter-intuitive to my wife and me. For another, there has been a natural flow around the subject of nourishment, as though our baby was glad to try as many foods as she has in part because we weren't forcing anything in the way of addition or subtraction on a dietary level. But the great reason that I have kept feeding my child bottles past when many would have suggested was the obvious bonding that takes place between us when I feed her in this way. I don't need a pair of breasts, and don't want a pair of breasts. But I have certainly yearned at times to duplicate the closeness shared by my precious daughter and beloved wife, and, now and then, I think I probably have.