No Need to Hurry

The word from our attachment parenting books is that we're not to spend too much energy focusing baby on the word "no" until she is at least 18 months old. The general idea seems to be that distracting her will be less frustrating for all concerned, and that by waiting until such a time as she can truly understand what we mean it will serve the trust-building we have been working on. But because all parents think their child is a genius, including us, there is a temptation to assume that baby's precocious intellectual development is automatically accompanied by precocious emotional development. I have every reason to believe, however, that to do so could be singularly hurtful. People long confused my supposed brain power with maturity, and I'm still recovering from it today.

That said, the next few months, during which we are sure to see a rise in fussiness), will be a test of our commitment to the parenting principles we have chosen for ourselves. When baby becomes distraught in public, wanting to climb down out of her stroller, for instance, it's hard not to care more about the opinion of strangers than about this complex, subtle, and challenging process that we are attempting to facilitate. And if you, my readers, are hoping my precious angel doesn't wind up spoiled, you're not alone in that.