Under the Weather

I've had a more or less serious cough for about ten days. Among the thoughts I've had about it: I'm not really sick; I don't deserve to be sick (meaning I don't deserve the designation "sick" and the compassion associated with it); I'm probably faking; etc. But now my precious little baby has the same cough, and a couple of things are taking place. One, I have instant, strong compassion for her. I know that she is suffering, and I know to respond to her with even more lovingkindness than usual. Two, I am being forced to confront the hypocrisy in my split stance on illness. If I allow no compassion for myself, how deep can my compassion for others, including my daughter, actually run? (I'll do my best today to be as kind to myself as I am to Annalee; I know that it will do us both good.)